2 years

Yesterday was my 2 year birthday/anniversary being diagnosed. It was also mine & Will's 1st anniversary being married, so I really didn't even think about my diabetes b-day. 

Lately though I've been running high & I don't know why. I've been getting sick a few times a week too. I'm really hoping it's not the beginnings of Celiac. I'm hoping I'm just being paranoid. I really think having a pump would make things easier! 
My dad was dx'd with T2 last week. I really hope he tries to exercise & try to get rid of it. I would if I could.
Do any of ya'll have problems exercising? I never know if I'm gonna go high or low.
& if I do then it's quite dramatic. It's never just a little bit. I'll either skyrocket or bottom out. & I hate having to deal with it so it's easier to just not exercise I feel like. I have started exercising a little bit again though. Just ten minutes here & there. So far, it's been easier & I'm able to catch my sugar before it jumps.
So, I'm keeping all my test strips for the month. Haha. I know. Sounds crazy, right? I just want to actually see how much I use in a week, 2 weeks, month, etc.
Let me see pictures of how much you use!
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http://instagram.com/smcclammy

Even roses have thorns.

So the other day wasn't a good day. Number wise it was fine but emotionally, it was a day I could of done without. I hated everything. Diabetes, people, life, everything. Mainly diabetes though. I didn't want to get out of bed & face reality. I didn't want to test. I didn't want to admit I am diabetic. There was a lot of tears, fighting, not wanting to remove my face from the covers. My husband, being the trooper he is, wouldn't let me give in to those "hating diabetic" thoughts. Some days though, you're just gonna have a bad day. Diabetes is a 24/7, 365 days a years issue. It's a lifestyle. Not a lifestyle I chose but one I have to deal with if I want a life. & it's emotional. Having to always, always, alwayssss deal with it is really hard. Even on the good days, it can be frustrating. Diabetes isn't always a party pooper but it definitely has it's days.

My Angel

He tells me I'm his Angel, the one God sent him. Really though, (& it wasn't until I started this post that I thought of it) he's my Angel. He's the one who takes care of my midnight lows & the one who is constantly on my butt about taking my meds and insulin. He's the one who is always there. I was dx'd when I was 19 so  my parents really don't know much about having to take care of me. They have Sunny D and peanut butter stocked at their house for my lows but really they haven't been educated.(That's going to be my next post; educating our loved ones) My Angel knows just by looking at me if I'm low or high. He can tell if I'm having problems talking or thinking that I'm low. He just knows. Thankfully I have him. He has been the biggest blessing to me. This isn't meant to be all mushy (because I'm really not the mushy type) but he is my Angel. He is the one God sent to take care of me and protect me. The other night I went low; I was 31. I woke him up which is hard to do some nights but I've learned to just put the meter in his face & he'll wake up. We were at his parents & forgot to bring my bag of low treats so he had to search through their pantry & find stuff. I ended up eating 3 packets of crackers, drinking an entire Gatorade  a spoonful of peanut butter and a snickers ice cream bar (weigh watchers kind.) I was still soo hungry but I knew I had to stop. That low just hit me so hard and I was starving. He tried to make me take a few units because we both knew I definitely overtreated. I was stubborn & wouldn't though. Surprisingly, when I woke up I was only 248. I really expected to be 300-400. Anyway, that's my Angel, the one God sent to help me with this battle, my husband.

Pumps!

So I've been taking my shots daily for the past 1 year, 10 months and 22 days. Well maybe not everyday because I've had those moments where I was done with being diabetic. I wasn't going to let it rule my life & I was going to be perfectly okay without insulin. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. & I've had those moments where I was sick of the weight insulin made me gain & so I decided I would go off it just to lose weight. That's a HORRIBLE idea by the way. It works but you feel terrible & you have no energy. at. all. So don't do it. Just take my word it's horrible. Anyway, since I've been married, my husband kept bringing up the pump. he was gung-ho about the idea. We just didn't have insurance at the time. Finally, once we did get insurance, I had to admit to him I didn't want a pump. Having something attached to me 24/7 scared me. I didn't want one at all. That was several months ago. Now that we're about to lose our insurance I want one. REALLY bad! I even ordered the demo OmniPod & I had been wearing that for the past 3 days. I finally took it off this morning even though I didn't really want to. Surprisingly, my blood sugars had been better over those 3 days. I think it was definitely a mental thing since the OmniPod didn't have any insulin in it. We'll lose our insurance on March 1st & I'm looking for a job that provides insurance. We were paying $1300 a month for my insurance with my husbands job. (Not because of my disease but just because of the way it was set up.) So now, I'm stuck with shots still. Do ya'll know any tricks for insurance or pumps? If so, I definitely want to hear!

Reality check

Diabetes. Type 1 vs. Type 2

I am so, so, sooo sick of people thinking type 2 & type 1 are the same. Or people who have type 2 thinking they "know" how you feel. Hello?!! You don't!! Just because the word diabetes is in there doesn't mean it's the same at all! I know a little girl with a form of diabetes (I can't remember the official name) but hers has nothing to do with her blood sugar. Hers deals with her sodium. Now does that even sound like any type of diabetes you know?? More than likely, no, it doesn't. So what makes type 1 & 2 the same?? Nothing. You don't know what its like to stick yourself 5-8 times a day or how you have to worry & make sure your GUM is carb free & you can't even begin to think about taking a sip of your friends soda. Do you know any type 2's that pay that much attention to their intake? I don't. In fact they pretty much seem pretty care free. Maybe not all of them but if you're taking a pill for your diabetes or only giving 1 or 2 shots a day don't even begin to think you know how I feel! I'm so sick of hearing type 2 people complain about their diabetes or say it sucks. Really?? Did you know I would LOVE to be type 2 instead of type 1??! I would love to have the opportunity to go to the gym & eat right to get rid of my diabetes. (I know not all type 2's can do that but it sure does make me mad when you sit there & complain about it instead of giving that a try!!) If you have a disease you could make better or possibly get rid of & you're not trying then shame on you! It's your fault & I feel no sympathy for you.


Here is a chart I stole from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/riva-greenberg/the-type-1-versus-type-2_b_611662.html

Characteristics of Disease	Type 1	Type 2
Risk Factors Very Different	Having a parent or sibling with type 1. Having another autoimmune condition. Environmental factors like stress or exposure to toxins. Possibly drinking cow's milk in infancy.	Poor diet. Being overweight. Being sedentary. Genetics. Being over the age of 45. Belonging to high-risk ethnic group. You had gestational diabetes or a baby weighing over 9 pounds. Certain medications. Possibly Agent Orange.
Symptoms Some overlapping	Extremely high blood sugar, thirst, frequent urination,  weight loss, hunger, fatigue.	High blood sugar, thirst, waking in the middle of the night to pee, waking with a headache, fatigue, high blood pressure, urinary tract infection, neuropathy.
Nature of Illness Very Different	Autoimmune condition-  your cells kill off your  insulin-producing (beta)  cells. Body no longer makes insulin.	Insulin-inefficiency. Body makes insulin, in fact may make too much, but it isn't used properly by the body.
Onset Very Different	Quick: Generally within  a few months	Slow: Generally several years after blood sugars begin to rise
Treatment Same to varying degree	Intense daily  self-management of food, exercise, insulin and stress. Must take multiple  injections of insulin or infusion through  insulin pump.	Daily self-management of food, exercise, pills and stress. Over time roughly 40% may need to use insulin. If so, multiple injections of insulin or infusion through insulin pump.
Age when you get it Typically different	Typically childhood or teen, but can occur at any age	Typically adults, but can occur at any age. On the rise in children due to obesity
Number of U.S. Patients  Very different	3 million (about 5% of the total of people who have diabetes)	23 million (about 95% of the total of people who have diabetes)
Complications Same to varying degrees	Damage to large and small blood vessels throughout the body which causes blindness, retinopathy, heart disease, kidney disease, amputation, hypoglycemia,  hypoglycemic unawareness,gastroparesis,ketoacidosis (more prevelant in type 1), earlier mortality.	Damage to large and small blood vessels throughout the body which causes blindness, retinopathy, heart disease, kidney disease, amputation, hypoglycemia,  hypoglycemic unawareness,gastroparesis, ketoacidosis(less prevalent in type 2) earlier mortality.
Preventable Very Different	No	Yes, for many with healthy diet and keeping weight in control
Reversible Very Different	No	Yes, for many with healthy diet and keeping weight in control

Here is a video that I recommend that explains diabetes. (:
What is diabetes?

The Begining

This is my first blog so i guess I'll start with a little "About Me" info. (:

My name is Stephanie and I was dx'd with Type 1 Diabetes on April 1st 2011.
I was 19 and living in Waco with some extended family. I had been home the weekend before and while visiting with different friends I complained about my vision changing and always being thirsty/peeing all the time. I hadn't connected the two symptoms at the time. While I was talking to C about being thirsty & having to get up constantly during the night to pee she suggested I should check my A1C. C has two T1D grown-up kids so she knew what she was talking about. I went back to Waco the next day and bought a mail-off A1C test from Wal-Mart. It had all the supplies in the box, you filled out a form and you could choose to have them mail the results or email them to you. I was REALLY scared to do my first finger poke but I finally was able to & I put the blood on the little circle for the test and them mailed it off.
That was a Monday and then early Friday morning (during one of my many trips to the bathroom) I checked my phone & I had an email with my results. It showed my A1C was a 7.7%  I didn't know what that meant but I knew 6% was much more normal. Later that day once I was finally up and around I went back to Wal-Mart & bought a disposable meter, lancets & a lancing device. I wasn't sure about everything so I had the Pharmacist come & help me. I couldn't wrap my head around the lancets & lancing device. I wasn't sure what they were for or how they were used. Finally it clicked & I said "Oh, it's like a gun & bullets!" He laughed & said he hadn't ever thought of it like that but yes. After I got back home I read all the directions & figured out what to do. Again, I was terrified to do the finger poke. Once I did it I remember it was in the 400's. I tested several times throughout the day & I never left the 400's. I was convinced it was broke.
Later that night my cousin came home. I remember asking her to come to my room & I instantly starting crying, I was so scared. I asked her to check her blood sugar to see if this meter truly was broke or not. Her bg was 96. I then told her the whole story and then she said we had to go to the E.R.
When we got to the E.R. I  walked in & said I was an undiagnosed diabetic. The nurses thought I was so dumb. I told them the whole story but I remember one saying I'd probably just drank a soda. They took my blood (which she managed to get everywhere, all over the sheets & down my arm.) Finally, the Dr came in & told me I had T1D & I had DKA (diabetic ketoacidosis.) I had done enough research throughout the week that I was at peace with everything. I wasn't scared at all. Then, the Dr said he'd be admitting me for the weekend. That's when I lost it & started crying. I had never been in the hospital before & my parents were several hours away.
I got into my room that night & the nurse gave me my first shot. By Saturday I was giving my own shots. I had a Diabetic Educator, a Nutritionist and an Endocrinologist. They were all so helpful to me & I learned so much! I was put on Lantus & Humalog pens. I was released on Monday and in the months after that I pretty much lived on frozen meals & soup since they have all the nutrition info on them.  I didn't have insurance which sucked! I had never even thought about needing insurance. In the following months I learned my body, dealt with highs & lows and learned the hard way about diabulimia.

It's been a process but it's a fight I'm still fighting! (: